Proof, if proof is needed

Quick experience I wanted to share:

Recently, I've been so lucky to have found a long lost Cousin. She lives over 100 miles away in - as good as - a different country but we keep in touch with Facebook.  Although much younger than me, she shares similar interests, hobbies and career aspirations as I do.

Earlier this week I couldn't ignore that she was struggling with a particularly bad day.  As any family member or friend I offered a shoulder and some suggestions on how she can work through that negative stuff.  I encouraged her to accept she might feel bad immediately after the event because we tend to be our own worst critic.   So step back from the situation and look at it for what it is - was it really THAT bad?  It wouldn't be hard to find and celebrate the positive parts and recognise you really are worthy in what you do.  The parts where you genuinely feel could have been improved are a golden opportunity to take action to get better and be the best at what you do.  So I encouraged her to use her own positive thinking and believe she can be as good as she wants to be.

The next day she was over the moon and left me a message "You was right... I kept positive and both performances today went AMAZING, so happy with the way I performed, wish you had the chance to see it".

I'm very proud of her as she created that positive energy herself and totally used it to her advantage.  Maybe it wouldn't have happened without the initial negative thoughts?  It certainly wouldn't have happened without her making the conscious effort to take control of it and turn it around.

This positive thinking can be pretty powerful stuff.

It's what it's all about

Positive Upload Day 2 has again been successful!

Challenges come what ever day it is.  So how did you get on?  It was a tough one for a few of us including me but have you noticed... we're still here and still smiling!

On 'PUD2' I was really interested to read a Facebook update of a friend - "If it wasn't positive upload day I may have vented on here just a wee bit!! I will resist!".  

This was great to see people are taking part and really letting the idea penetrate their life. But looking at the statement, there's an opportunity to take this to the next level if you want to feel the full benefit of the powerful Positive Thinking.

It's perfectly normal to feel your cage getting rattled and then wish to vent your anger.  What is important is that we control that energy and keep control of it.  Whatever situation has caused you to feel that way can not change.  I'm yet to find anyone who is actually successful in changing the past so you've got to accept it has happened.  There may be opportunities to change the future of the situation but you will need to understand your options and really want to do what you choose.  But in the here and now, when you feel like screaming at the top of your lungs, it's not going to make you feel any better.

For me, it's a case of putting that specific situation into perspective.  I too had a challenging day but my challenge was a minute part of my 'big picture'.  Putting it into perspective I have other huge benefits to my life such as a lovely warm safe house where my beautiful family live and were at home later that day to offer me comfort.  I have some amazing friends, take part in great hobbies, am fortunate enough to have holidays to experience the world, have healthy and extremely caring parents... the list goes on.  So, in my day, a couple of people who were being pretty fowl to me earlier melts away into insignificance when I know how life is pretty damn good for me really.

My situation is unique.  As everyone's is.  The combination of my family, friends, job, home, pets etc etc is totally unique to me as it is to you.  So the way you react and your list of positive things will be personal to you.  But that's another great positive thing about being human.  You are YOU and you're brilliant in your own unique way.  

That should put a smile on your face when things seem tough?

Positive Upload Day 2!

It's the second Positive Upload Day.  A day to be intent on feeling & being positive and sharing that positivity on line and with everyone you meet.  Being mindful of your positive attitude can have such a profound effect on your day if you set that expectation from the start.

Today at work I have an intense meeting about an incident that happened last Sunday.  I've been dreading it all week so I'm seeing it that having Positive Upload Day today is going to be a huge advantage to me.  

I'm going to keep my thoughts positive.  I'm wearing my favourite shirt, wearing my favourite fragrance, got the best tunes to listen to on the way in to work, when I get in the meeting I'll sit next to those I know and who will be mutually supportive.  I know with these and other simple proactive strategies I'll be fine and can even use the meeting very much for my advantage.  Some of it may well be challenging but I know it’s only for the morning and I know I have the strongest chance of being positive.  There is a great opportunity to learn and grow professionally from it which is a huge positive thing.

You’ll find you can use your own strategies for situations you may not have been looking forward to and turn them into positive experiences.

Enjoy your day today; you’ll have a positively great one!  Keep smiling and share your experiences with the friends you meet, on your Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, Bebo social networks etc and of course at www.facebook.com/positiveupload

Affirmations predict the future

Affirmations - are they really worth it?  Simply yes, here's why...

Have you ever caught yourself saying things like 'see, I told you I'd break it' or 'I'll never do it, I'm just not clever enough' and then don't achieve what you were working so hard towards?  I do far too often.  It is so easy to talk yourself out of success, achievements, happiness, positivity when you might actually have been destined to get it.  But when we keep telling ourselves we won't get it eventually it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy and we almost make ourselves miss out.  Negative thoughts tend to lead you to a lack of success, bad moods and dissatisfaction.

So, if you accept that theory then you will accept this too: telling yourself you're going to succeed, you'll achieve your goal, stay happy and positive eventually you believe it.  And as soon as you believe it... it becomes true.  Positive thoughts lead to positive actions.

Sounds simple but if you are not of a naturally positive disposition all the time or there are certain things you are not confident with, afraid of or don't understand, believing that positive outcome can be very challenging.

What can you do about it?

Affirmations are your own personal statements to remind you of your happy, positive achieving self.  To help you formulate yours think of this:  Firstly accept that some times things will seem harder for you than others.  You are - after all - only human and we're all different.  Then, focus on your strengths.  You have so many of them and you will have a list of achievements as long as your arm.  You can always get a close friend or family member to help you.  Thirdly, never accept defeat as the 'norm'.  Just because you failed something once or twice doesn't mean thats how it should always be?  Just because someone won £41m on the Euromillions doesn't mean they'll win it every week!  Learn from it and know that you can move on - your turn will come... it WILL!

Therefore, your affirmations can look anything like this-

• I have a great network of family and friends who really love and care for me
• I am an intelligent hard working person worthy of promotion
• The more love I give the more I receive
• I'm really good at writing excellent informative reports
• When I believe in myself so do others
• My life is fulfilling with different challenges every day
• My body is really well equipped to combat illness
• I am the perfect weight for the perfect me
• I am successful in what I do

Image by sema

The list should be personal to you and meaningful.  You could use an affirmation like "I have money in abundance" yet be horridly overdrawn with bailiffs at the door.  It's up to you how you frame it, it could be you are rich because of all the things you have that money can't buy or that you have the opportunities in front of you to achieve money in abundance so you might say instead 'I am on my way to achieving money in abundance'.  As long as it keeps you motivated and more importantly you believe it.

I keep mine on little cards - the size of credit cards and it a wallet.  No-one knows about them (apart from you) but I believe in what I've written and they help me to be positive, especially at times when I find it more challenging.

If you like, you can share some here or on the Facebook page.

Keep smiling, Thursday Feb 2nd the 2nd Positive Upload Day is only round the corner!

Emergency Charge point

I don't know about you but I find my life is an emotional roller coaster.  Most times I can be happy and positive looking forward to each day, the people I'll meet in it and the challenges it might present.  But some times my negative thoughts take over, you know the feeling - your head gets heavier, shoulders drop and you almost see that cloud drift over you.  At that point it's literally like you have to declare war on these feelings.

The reason you feel down should be acknowledged, sometimes you know you're being silly but other times it's quite right to feel down.  Now then... it's not a bad thing to feel down when something bad has happened, it's quite natural!  But it's what you do with those feelings when it's time to pick yourself up that matters.  What do you do if you really want to pull yourself out of feeling like that it's more of a challenge than you want it to be?

Friends and family are utterly essential in your emergency tool kit in getting back to positivity.  Many friends could be fair weather friends just happy to see you when you're bright and chipper and happy to see your smile, but only when you're smiling... you can come back when you're on your feet again.  That's fine too, these friends are just as important, but when you really want to get yourself charged from empty to positive again you need someone you know you can rely on.  Who it is doesn't matter and by that I mean it doesn't have to be your partner or your parent.  It can be a friend, someone you only speak to every now and again, maybe a work colleague, maybe a counsellor at the end of a phone (speaking to a stranger can often be more effective as you tend to be more open and honest).  You need someone constructive, someone who'll not only listen well but can understand why you feel that way and help show you the way back to your smiles.

There's always someone willing to listen but you also need that feedback too otherwise you may find you're not always much further forward.

As long as you know who they are and you have them on speed dial.

If your 'charge point' is someone you know, talk to them about it, tell them how important they are and how much you value that relationship, and treasure it.  It might just save your life.